4.25.2010

Douchebags of the Month!

Greetings puny earthlings!

Sorry it's been so long between posts. I'm lazy, I admit, but there's been so much douchebaggery lately I just had to make a statement.

So here are the DOUCHEBAGS OF THE MONTH in no particular order.

THE OBAMA ADMINISTRATION For a myriad of reasons, but chiefly their ignoring of Iran's nuclear threat, and discarding America's allies in favor of their ongoing smear campaign against the Tea Party movement through proxies like--

PRESIDENT BILL CLINTON The pants-less prez put on his smart glasses to show the world just how big a tool he really is. What did he do this time? He compared the Tea Party movement to mass murdering scumbag Timothy McVeigh. I wanted to call him and ask how a movement asking for more responsible spending of taxpayer's money could be compared to a paranoid thug who got pushed over the edge by the bungling operations of Clinton's justice department, but all I could get was his secretary. She was no help because she wouldn't talk with her mouth full.

THE MAINSTREAM MEDIA For continuing to play lap-dog to the current administration and playing along with their smear campaign against a growing segment of the population. And they wonder why they're all sinking and alternative outlets are thriving. Disgusting and stupid, a dangerous combination.

COMEDY CENTRAL For caving into the not-so-veiled threats of a Islamist and giving them yet another victory in their ongoing war against the right of free speech and true rebels like the makers of South Park. Comedy Central will mock Christianity and Judaism to no end, but when it comes to the people who actually do murder artists on the street they become nutless wonders. Then they go to a dinner party in Malibu and be feted as "courageous" for letting Sarah Silverman make yet another boring Jesus joke.

ABU TALHAH AL AMRIKEE For being the maker of the no-so-veiled threats against the makers of South Park and the right of free expression. At least have the
cojones to admit you made a threat when you make a threat.

THE GREEN MOVEMENT For transforming from a movement aimed at curbing pollution and toxic waste into a profiteering, power mongering bastardization of all it once stood for. Thanks to Rachel Carson's misguided campaign against DDT hundreds of thousands, if not millions die from malaria every year. Scientists have whored out and destroyed their integrity in the name of "Climate Change" and politicians do everything they can to grab your money, and control your lives. Way to go Greenies, way to go.

If you find yourself on this list, then it means that...

Keep watching the skies, because we're watching you.

4.09.2010

The Leftist Mind: Nukes For Thee, But Not For Me

Greetings puny Earthlings.

Sorry for the light posting lately, but I've been a very lazy overlord.

But I think it's safe to dip our toe into that cesspit known as the Leftist Mind, and this time I'm going for the nuclear option.

For decades the simplest part of American foreign policy was the country's nuclear posture. It basically said that any country, or agents of said country, that attacks the USA with nuclear, biological, or chemical weapons, would get the living shit nuked out of them.


This is actually a very sound policy, and one followed by American presidents for decades. Even Jimmy Carter signed off on it. But current prez Barack Obama decides that striking back at America's foreign enemies with the biggest bottle of whoop-ass Earthlings can muster is just a little too rough and tumble for him.

His new policy is that if a country attacks the USA with biological or chemical weapons, he will have his lawyers check their paperwork to see if that country is compliant with international nuclear non-proliferation treaties. If they have their no-nuke papers filed with the proper international body, then they won't have to face the ultimate sanction, and instead have to face some sort of conventional reprisal.

To translate: Imagine an American city completely depopulated with some nasty lab-created super-germ. Everyone, and I mean hundreds of thousands, maybe millions, in that city is dead, and some have become zombies thanks to this attack. The nasty super-germ was made in a lab in a country called Shitholistand.

President Obama, faced with a city of corpses, immediately dispatches his lawyers to make sure that Shitholistan hasn't been making nukes along with their super-germs. If they're declared nuke free by the United Nations, then Obama has the option of lobbing a few conventional bombs at the country, doing nothing but kill a few token civilians deliberately put in harm's way by the Grand Poobah of Shitholistan, or he can send in troops, so they can all be exposed to Shitholistan's collection of nasty viruses and bacterium.

Pres. Obama has effectively tied America's swift right hand behind its back.

Why?

Because Pres. Obama is a leftist, and here is how leftists think.

1. Leftists believe that the USA is an imperialist power that oppresses, abuses, and has actually nuked poor innocent non-Americans for no other reason than simple racism.

In short, he thinks like Tom Hanks. I'll bet dinars to donuts that Obama is convinced that Truman OK'ed the nuking of Hiroshima and Nagasaki because he wanted to "annihilate" the "other" for daring to be ethnically different. Completely forgetting that the Japanese of the 1940s were a 100% militarized society, hardened by decades of Asian conquests, whose soldiers fought like demons and didn't whine like pussy little Al Qaida bitches that the Yankees were mean to them on the rare instances they were captured alive. And let's not forget that Japan also started the war

2. Leftists think that if you're weak, then you will be loved.

Sure, and unicorns will frolic in green fields. You see, the Leftist sees the world as a zero-sum game. America is prosperous not because of its individual liberty and industrious population. It is prosperous because it must have taken that wealth from someone else. The same goes with strength. To the leftist America cannot create strength, it has to steal it, by bullying poor innocent people like the Iranian Mullahs.

So, by their logic, if America is weak, then the oppressed will love them, and no longer attack.

WRONG!

If America is weak, then those Obama likes to call "outliers" like Ahmadinejad, Kim Jong Ill, and all the other tin-pot dictators will see it as a big fat target unwilling and unable to fight back, and they will all go for a piece.

3. The leftist doesn't believe in truth. Decades of "post-modern" intellectual nihilism has created a generation, now sitting in Washington, that thinks that there is no such thing as truth, or such "black & white" concepts like right and wrong. To them there is only opinion, and all opinion is valid, even if spat out by a delusional paranoiac hallucinating golden showers in the UN, while preparing to bring about his personal messiah by slaughtering as many people as possible.

This means that a leftist is perfectly able to decry fellow Americans as "racists," "sexists," "homophobes," and "terrorists" while completely ignoring real, and violent racist, sexist, homophobic terrorists who publicly declare their intentions and attitudes.

Those people are forgiven, or excused, because they are "oppressed" because someone from the evil imperialist West did something mean to one of their ancestors, and not because their own leadership consists of a gaggle of certifiable psychopaths.

Now I'd like to go back to the advantage of having a nuclear option.

As you know, I'm the Supreme Overlord of the Known Universe. Now that position means that a lot of little piss-pots are always trying to do something nasty to become the next alpha dog. There is one thing that keeps those piss-pots at bay.

And that is making them think you're fucking out of your fucking mind.

Making your enemies think you're crazy, and fully capable of unleashing the unspeakable upon them for looking at you cockeyed is a wonderful way of making them think twice before doing something stupid. Dictators are all the same, they'll gladly kill thousands of the innocent, but threaten to irradiate their own innards with the heat of a thousand suns, and they tend to chill out.

To do that right, you have to keep all your options open. Because someone who refuses certain ways of striking back, even when justified, is just going to get hit, again, and again.

Keep watching the skies, because we're watching you.
by attacking Pearl Harbor.