Knees Jerking

Greetings puny Earthlings.

Sorry we've been so lazy posting lately. But it looks like we have another question, at least I think it's another question:
trent reker said...nice. we're all about superior cultures that can't spell or punctuate in the language they choose to use for their world domination scheme. are you sure you didn't get a spaceship from spacedad and take off for a weekend to see how many free drinks you could get in vegas?
And I should take lessons in Earthling grammar from someone who apparently doesn't believe in capital letters?

I could say that any grammatical errors I may have made come from Earthling English being my 6 billionth language, but those who have been with this blog since the beginning have noticed a marked improvement in the translating. So I'll just put your comment in the old circular file marked "Troll Scraps," and get down to business.


1. There's a whole lot of talk going on about the Shirley Sherrod, the rural affairs bureaucrat who had some comments from a speech sent, out of context, to internet media mogul Andrew Breitbart. Breitbart posted them, the White House went bug-shit, fired Sherrod, found out the full story, then rehired her, slandered Breitbart & Fox News for reporting the story.

Now as an intergalactic ruler, things being taken out of context by speakers happen all the time, but my minions always investigate the claims before firing anyone. It's just cheaper than all the other rigmarole, so why didn't the White House do it?

Because it was so believable.

Remember, this is the same White House that tried to get Van Jones, a self-proclaimed Marxist Truther as their "Green Jobs Czar."

The same White House whose partisan minions in the NAACP decided to forgo the real issues facing African Americans, like black on black violent crime, high rates of family disintegration, and crumbling public education systems, to brand the Tea Party movement racist.

The same White House that appointed AG Eric Holder, whose Justice Department decided that justice doesn't include stopping nut-bar racist New Black Panther Party thugs from threatening voters even after they've been convicted.

The list goes on, and on, and on. Which makes you wonder how they managed to cram in so much hypocrisy in less than two years in office. So you can understand why the Obama administration moved so quickly and clumsily to fire her without even investigating the allegations.

The cherry on top of this whole issue was when Shirley Sherrod went on TV and proved Breitbart right after all when she accused him of wanting to take America back to slavery.


2. Journolist was a by-invitation-only private e-mail thingy where liberal leaning journalists, intellectuals (I use that term loosely) and like minded semi-thinkers could share recipes for organic home-made granola cookies, bury stories about Obama and his racist Pastor, plot to destroy Sarah Palin, conspiracies to slander government critics as racist, and violent Rush Limbaugh death fantasies.

Why are people surprised?

Look at what liberal talk radio host Mike Malloy says in public:
Murdoch is a Nazi; Murdoch is a Nazi! And everyone that works for him is a potential murderer! Do you not -- do you not get that? Why does anybody in this administration pay any attention whatsoever to anything these people say? They shouldn't be listened to; they should be dragged into the street and pummeled! And I'd be very happy to be the first person to do it.
And we expect them to be any more polite when they're among their own brain-dead, morally bankrupt, fascistic kind?

Despite their claims of love of civil liberties, free speech, and other constitutional rights, the Leftist Mind is, at its core, a fascistic mind that sees the world in hard Manichean terms. They are so certain that they are correct in every way, those who may differ from them are not only wrong, they are actively evil and in the pay of some sinister force bent on world destruction.

Well as a sinister force bent on world destruction, I can tell you that I ain't paying anyone on your puny little planet.

This is the same profession that honors the recently deceased Daniel Schorr, who outlived his journalistic integrity by about 60 years. They tend to gloss over that he was a partisan hack, who deliberately fabricated a story on the CBS National News that claimed Republican presidential candidate Barry Goldwater was going to Germany to a secret Neo-Nazi conference to get his orders on destroying America.

The simple fact that he wasn't tarred, feathered, and run out of the profession of journalism, but instead given a cushy spot as a grey eminence suckling on the taxpayer subsidized teat of National Public Radio illustrates the state of the media today.

Journalism is dying, because journalism killed itself when it shifted from at least being open about their biases, to claiming their biases were in fact objective reality and the sum of all morality. All it cares about is getting and keeping power for its political masters, nothing more, and truth has nothing to do with it.

People want opinion presented by pundits, not reporters, and are fleeing the old media in droves because they know that they are not getting the truth, or any discussion about what might be true. They are not reporters, they are whores, and you don't get your news from whores.

Keep watching the skies, because we're watching you.


Questions & Answers!

MOXARGON- Greeting puny Earthlings. Welcome to another long awaited edition of ASK THE MOXARGON GROUP. You have questions, and we have the answers. I'm joined by our regulars Xran the Fleshrender, Android CAI/7, Tektak F. Mechanoid, Snotglob T. Mutant, and Varos Quasar. Good to have you all here. Let's skip the formalities, and leap right into the first question.
Mark in VA asked... Why are you demanding intergalactic media silence on the Blagojevich trial? Is Lindsey Lohan's trial really more newsworthy?
XRAN- I think I can answer that one.

MOXARGON- Go right ahead old chum.

XRAN- There isn't intergalactic media silence on the trial of disgraced Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich. That media blackout is strictly an Earth only affair. No one here ordered any blocking of the coverage of his ongoing legal problems.

MOXARGON- Android CAI/7 can you tell him the reason why? I'm trying to spread it around today and give everyone a chance to talk.

ANDROID CAI/7- The reason is quite simple--

SNOTGLOB- Blagojevich is innocent!!


SNOTGLOB- Blagojevich is innocent!

VAROS- It's a Republican Nazi witch hunt of an innocent man with incredible hair!!

TEKTAK- Snotglob you ignorant hermaphrodite slut. What the hell are you saying, and why is Varos joining you?

SNOTGLOB- I believe he's innocent.

TEKTAK- Why do you believe that?

SNOTGLOB- He's a Democrat. Chicago Democrats are the purest politicians the universe has ever seen.

ANDROID CAI/7- I think Snotglob's extreme illogic has actually answered the question.

MOXARGON- That the mainstream media is ignoring Blagojevich's trial because it may embarrass their masters in the Democratic Party and their billionaire backers?

ANDROID CAI/7- More or less, yes.

MOXARGON- Next question:
Blackhawk12151 asked... It is well known that America has problems with illegal aliens and border security. Are there any similar problems being dealt with by MoxArgon? Some pesky aliens planet hoping without the proper documentation?
MOXARGON- Since this is about my government, I guess I can answer it. In my empire citizens are free to go to whatever planet they wish to live on. Now I must state that none of the planets in my empire are run by governments as corrupt, incompetent, and just plain shit-heeled as the government of Mexico. Planets that are as badly run as Mexico, aren't part of my empire, and incapable of space travel.

XRAN- But there is immigration though?

MOXARGON- Oh, yes, lots. We're always terraforming new planets and allowing people to colonize them. It's a great way to ease the pressure on overpopulated planets, and grow the overall intergalactic economy. As for documentation, it's impossible to travel without it considering we implant such documentation into your DNA. If you don't have your papers, then you're missing all of your cells. Even our androids have some organic parts that contain their identification codes. Next question:
Damian G. asked... Given that the fauna of alien worlds is decidedly different from that of Earth, what would be your home planets' equivalents of a "Mama Grizzly"?
XRAN- Don't go there.

MOXARGON- I'm going there.

XRAN- Damn it.

MOXARGON- My home planet's equivalent of a "Mama Grizzly" is called Nestarrax. Otherwise known as the second ex-missus Xran.

XRAN- Douche.

MOXARGON- Keep your questions coming folks. Ask us about policy, the oil spill, or anything else you can think of. We'll answer them, and keep watching the skies, because we're watching you.



Greetings puny Earthlings.

We here at the MoxArgon Group have been a tad light and loose with the blogging lately. Probably because there is just so much to complain about and explain to you lesser mortals, we just don't know where to start.

So we're going to let you tell us where to start!

It's time for


If you have a question about any aspect of your planet's politics, policies, and poltroons, then leave them in the comments.

All we ask is that you leave a name for us to call you, but aside from that ask early and ask often.

So get asking. Don't make me come down there.

Keep watching the skies, because we're watching you.