MOXARGON- Greetings puny Earthlings, and welcome the Moxargon Group's first anniversary box-social. As promised we have some old friends joining us for this special edition. As usual we have Xran the Fleshrender.
XRAN- How's it hanging?
MOXARGON- Android CAI/7.
ANDROID CAI/7- Greetings Earthlings.
MOXARGON- Varos Quasar.
VAROS- Hi there.
MOXARGON- Our friends from Point-Counterpoint, Tektak F. Mechanoid.
TEKTAK- Hello.
MOXARGON- Snotglob the mutant.
SNOTGLOB- Hi.
MOXARGON- And joining us a little later will be our old friend Koos-Koos the Seer of the future to tell what the next year will bring us.
KOOS-KOOS- I knew I was going to be invited here.
MOXARGON- And a very special guest, group alumnus, radio host, and old and dear friend Dalek Drone-9099. Welcome back Drone-9099.
DRONE-9099- Exterminate! Exterminate!
MOXARGON- I see you're still a little touchy about the whole Anne Coulter thing, eh? Let's move onto our first topic. Incumbent senator Joseph Lieberman was defeated by anti-war millionaire and political neophyte End Lamont in the race for the Democratic Party nomination. What does this mean for Democrats and Republicans?
XRAN- I think it could hurt the Republicans and their prosecution of the war effort.
ANDROID CAI/7- I disagree. I think it bodes ill for the prospects of the Democratic Party.
VAROS- I must admit that I think it's completely up in the air for me.
MOXARGON- Drone-9099?
DRONE-9099- Exterminate! Exterminate!
TEKTAK- I think the Democrats are going to be in for a very rude awakening. The real bellwether event is the defeat of Cynthia McKinney in Georgia for the Democratic nomination. Unlike Lamont, she didn't have millions of dollars and an internet campaign to sign up anti-war moonbats into the Democratic Party. She had to face a demographic most closely resembling the average American electorate, and she got her ass kicked. Only an idiot would vote for a weak on defense moonbat during wartime. And for an example of that kind of idiot...
SNOTGLOB- I disagree with Tektak. I think Ned Lamont is the future. The great Michael Moore said it best, anyone not willing to surrender Iraq, and after that Europe and America to the jihadis has no place in the Democratic Party or in the American Congress. The world needs the guidance of rich limousine liberals to show them that the civilization that they're ancestors struggled to build and preserve isn't worth defending.
TEKTAK- I rest my case.
MOXARGON- I have to admit that I'm with Tektak on this one. The Democrats seem intent on committing suicide and they want to take the entire western world with them. Next topic: The fighting in the Middle East. As of this transmission the cease-fire between Hezbollah and Israel seems to be holding. What do you think?
XRAN- Agreeing to the cease-fire was a major mistake for the Israelis. You don't negotiate with people like Hezbollah, you hunt them down, kill them horribly, and make a new suit from their skins.
ANDROID CAI/7- I prefer vaporization. Much cleaner.
VAROS- I think the Israelis are expecting Hezbollah to blow the cease-fire and then hit them with everything they've got.
DRONE-9099- Exterminate! Exterminate!
TEKTAK- I disagree with Drone-9099 on that issue. There's no way world opinion would turn to side with Israel if Hezbollah breaks the cease-fire. Why, because world opinion is dictated by organizations like the UN, so-called 'progressive' NGOs, academics, and the media, which we all know are crawling with moronic anti-Semites who would cut their own throats before admitting that Jews have a right to live in peace.
SNOTGLOB- I think the cease fire's a good thing. I mean those evil Israelis only killed civilians in their war against the Lebanese people! The press told me so!
MOXARGON- The same press that published obviously doctored photos of death and destruction?
XRAN- The same press that allowed some dork in a green helmet to direct their coverage in what could possibly be faked atrocities?
ANDROID CAI/7- The same press that regularly ignores the fact that Hezbollah terrorists uses women and children as human shields so that their death fuel a perpetual Islamic hate machine?
SNOTGLOB- Why are you picking on me?
MOXARGON- Because it's the only way you'll learn Snotglob. Hassan Nasrallah's already claiming victory, even though Hezbollah got a royal reaming from the Israelis.
VAROS- That is standard operating procedure for Islamic wars. Start a fight with Israel, get your asses kicked, use your own children to catch bullets, and then go crying to the UN to get the West to make Israel back down. And when Israel does, claim you defeated them.
ANDROID CAI/7- And the truly illogical part is that the Arab world actually seems to believe these claims, illustrating how culturally and socially bankrupt Islam society is.
SNOTGLOB- That is an Islamophobic remark! You sir are a racist!
ANDROID CAI/7- I think you need a race to be a racist.
SNOTGLOB- RACIST!
MOXARGON- Android CAI/7 is just being logical. What reasons do the Islamic world give the rest of the Earthlings that Islamophobia is wrong? As we speak yet another group of young Muslims have been arrested for plotting to blow up airliners in the hope of killing as many people as possible. Iran seeks nuclear weapons for the sole purpose of genocide and terrorism. Arab militias are hunting African Muslims in the Sudan to control oil reserves. Canadian Muslims plotted to blow up innocent people and behead their Prime Minister. Chechen Muslims have massacred schoolchildren. Hell, everywhere Islam meets any other faith, it usually results in perpetual war and horror.
XRAN- Exactly, I think the burden of proof has fallen squarely on the shoulders of the Islamic world to prove that they don't deserve to be feared.
SNOTGLOB- They are just expressing their societal anger!
MOXARGON- At what? Most terrorists come from from middle to upper-middle class families, they aren't of the oppressed masses, in fact, most come from the oppressors. What they are is power hungry, and their lust for power is fuelled by a political left who have taken moral equivalence to a ridiculous degree. The Islamic Fascists see the Western World as weak and ripe for the plucking, thinking that plunging the world back into the Dark Ages would somehow be an improvement.
ANDROID CAI/7- It would be an improvement for us. A planet unable to sustain itself would be easier to conquer.
MOXARGON- Good point. Go right ahead then Osama. Ha-ha!
SNOTGLOB- You are all racist servants of the Zionist conspiracy to control the Earth!
MOXARGON- Now that would be a bad situation for us.
SNOTGLOB- What?
MOXARGON- It would be bad for us if the Jews really ruled the Earth. Then it would be a real fight. All those states with advanced Earthling technology, civil rights for women and minorities, national health care, well trained and led militaries, and a legal system based on real justice instead of tribal taboos. That would be rough for us.
ANDROID CAI/7- Excellent thought. Jews are not interested in oppressing those who seek to live in peace, they have no compunction to convert, segregate, or destroy people of other faiths, and have shown a remarkable capability to contribute positively to Earthling society beyond their small numbers. Look at the sheer number of Jewish Nobel Prize winners.
TEKTAK- I've been saying that for years.
MOXARGON- Let's move onto our next segment. Koos-Koos the Seer of the Future has joined us to let us in on what the year ahead hold in store for us. Koos-Koos.
KOOS-KOOS- I predict that a certain blue-colored Intergalactic Conqueror will fly into a made rage over the actions of an Earthling blogger.
MOXARGON- Are you talking about me? It can't be about that Fitch Bitch always claiming to call me out. I literally crap bigger than that guy.
KOOS-KOOS- It will not be Fitch.
MOXARGON- Who?
KOOS-KOOS- I won't spoil the surprise.
MOXARGON- Wanker.
KOOS-KOOS- I knew you were going to say that.
MOXARGON- Let's move onto our next segment. It's a real surprise. We contracted, okay, we enslaved blogger Vox Poplar to make us a movie. I love your Earthling movies, and if Michelle Malkin can vlog, then we can too. Roll it Xran!
MOXARGON- That's it?
XRAN- That's the film he gave me.
DRONE-9099- Exterminate! Exterminate!
MOXARGON- We spent $183 million on that?
XRAN- Poplar said he ran up some expenses...
MOXARGON- I'll kill the little bastard!
KOOS-KOOS- You see.
MOXARGON- Shut your hole! And to you Earthlings, keep watching the skies, because we're watching you. And if your name is Vox Poplar, you better watch out!
2 comments:
National healh care?!
Then all the Americans would be WEAKENED because it would take two months to get a doctor's appointment!
Why do I get the image of you acting out this "group discussion" with snazzy little finger puppets?
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