Overheard by Snotglob: Dinner Time With Al

Hello Earthlings!

It's me, Snotglob, and I'm allowed to post solo again.

There's been a bit of controversy over god-like environmentalist Al Gore serving endangered Chilean Sea Bass to the guests at his daughter's wedding.

Well I've decided to get to the bottom of the story using my greatest talent.

My superkeen hearing.

So I extended my hearing antennae and aimed them at a Beverly Hills eatery called Chez Pretense where Al Gore and his wife Tipper were having lunch.

Let's all look at the transcript.

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AL: Boy am I hungry.

TIPPER: Look at these prices. This place sure is expensive.

AL: We can afford it. Or to be more exact, the school I'm lecturing at tonight can afford it, since they are paying for it. Bwah-hah-hah!

TIPPER: Oh Al, you're so smart.

AL: There's nothing here on this menu I want, so I'll have to make a special order. Waiter. WAITER!

WAITER: Are you ready to order monsieur?

AL: Yes. I demand that you bring me a special order of Coq Au Vin.

WAITER: But Coq Au Vin is on the menu, it is not a special order.

AL: It is the way I like it. I want you to replace the common chicken with something special. Something like an Ivory Billed Woodpecker.

WAITER: But that bird is endangered.

AL: So will you job if you keep up that impertinent talk. DON'T YOU KNOW WHO I AM? I'M AL F#CKING GORE YOU PEASANT UNDER GLASS! I'M THE RIGHTFUL PRESIDENT OF THIS GODDAMN COUNTRY NO MATTER WHAT THE VOTES SAY!

TIPPER: I'm sure he sees reason. Don't you? DON'T YOU?

WAITER: Yes, I understand. One Ivory Billed Woodpecker.

AL: I also want the dinner served in a bowl made from the scooped out shell of an endangered loggerhead turtle. Make sure it's been freshly killed, I don't want to eat my lunch out of some goddamn museum piece.

WAITER: Yes Monsieur. One dead loggerhead turtle.

AL: And we want our cutlery hand carved from the horns of a freshly killed Javan Rhino.

WAITER: Oui monsieur, one dead rhino.

AL: Better kill two, I hate to think of them being alone.

TIPPER: I'll have the souffle, but I want it made from the eggs of the California Condor.

AL: I'll skip desert. I'm watching my figure, but I want you to also sucker punch a baby Rwandan mountain gorilla in the back of the head while you're getting our food.

TIPPER: And be quick about it. I got a lot of gangster rappers as friends because my warning labels made it possible for them curse in songs!

WAITER: Oui monsieur.

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I don't hear anything untoward in that little exchange. What do you think?