5.28.2008

Need A Boost?

Are you a former White House Spokesman who wasn't very good at his job?
Are you mocked and ridiculed by the members of the press?
Is the only action your getting Helen Thomas after she's had a few apple martinis?
Are you unhappy?

THEN YOU NEED
SCOTT MCCLELLAN'S
6 STEPS
4 SUCCESS


1. WRITE A BOOK!

2. WHIP UP SOME BOMBSHELLS THAT:

A. MAKE A REPUBLICAN PRESIDENT LOOK BAD

B. TELL KOS THAT HE WAS RIGHT ABOUT EVERYTHING ALL ALONG

3. MAKE OODLES OF CASH FROM THE MOVIE RIGHTS

4. BE PRAISED BY THE PEOPLE WHO ONCE SHOWED YOU THE SAME RESPECT THEY SHOWED TO A DOG TURD 5. GET INVITED TO SEXY PARTIES

6. BE HAPPY!

So order now, only $19.95!

4 comments:

RT said...

Whenever I watched one of his press conferences I just squirmed. The press totally owned him and he seemed so overwhelmed and incompetent.

zoey said...

dang i am jealous of you crazy aliens. you said all of this so much better the i did. oh snap!

Marvin said...

Remember the old TV Show "Spin City." It had the incompetent press secretary named Paul. Doesn't he kind of remind you of Paul?

Chris C said...

What baffles me is this book reveals nothing new. There is nothing in there we have not already read or heard.

And it comes from a former mouthpiece of the Presidency. I can't see anyone in that position being privy to any information they weren't supposed to know.

Their job is to make everything they say sound rosy and optimistic. McClellan makes it sound like his job was to sit in on every meeting and conference between anyone in the Cabinet and discern what to tell the media.