Hi Earthlings.Snotglob T. Mutant here, and Remulak is letting me post because they're all feeling lazy, what with bikini season starting on the planet Sexulon IV, so I'm going to let my super-freakish hearing do the work.
Today I pointed my ears at the headquarters of the MSNBC news channel, to hear real journalists talk about the truth, not like those fascists at Faux Noise Channel!
Let's take a listen:
CUB REPORTER- I have a report that Barack Obama is now claiming that his Uncle liberated Auschwitz in WW2.Wow, it's like hearing Edward R. Murrow talking with Ida Tarbell, and I don't know who those people are...
NEWS PRODUCER- So what?
CUB REPORTER- The Soviet Red Army liberated Auschwitz, not the American Army. He's either mistaken about basic history, lying, or delusional.
NEWS PRODUCER- But he's a Democrat, we can't report that, or the many other flubs, like knowing what Memorial Day is for, or saying we have 57 states, we're journalists, it's our sacred duty to protect Democratic candidates!
KEITH OLBERMANN- I just got a hot tip! Dan Quayle lost a game of Scrabble to his nephew!
NEWS PRODUCER- Now that's news! Send out the choppers, I want a satellite link, this is a major event, and we're going live!
Goodnight and good luck.
1 comment:
You missed what I would consider the most obvious... His grandfather was a communist working for the red army during WWII!
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