9.17.2008

Point/Counterpoint- Magazines & Books

TEKTAK- Hello Earthlings, puny and otherwise, it's time for another edition of Point- Counterpoint. I'm Tektak F. Mechanoid from the Right.

SNOTGLOB- And I'm Snotglob T. Mutant from the Left.

TEKTAK- First topic, the Atlantic Monthly was embarrassed when it was revealed that the photographer they hired to take pictures of Republican candidate John McCain photo-shopped the pics to make him look sinister.

SNOTGLOB- What's wrong with that? Isn't he sinister?

TEKTAK- Snotglob you ignorant hermaphrodite slut! The Atlantic Monthly is supposed to be a serious magazine of journalism and discussion, not be a propaganda organ for the Democratic Party!

SNOTGLOB- Aren't those two things the same?

TEKTAK- I don't even know why the photographer was hired, since her Bush Derangement Syndrome compelled her to terrorize and abuse children to make one of her political statements.

SNOTGLOB- There's nothing wrong with abusing children.

TEKTAK- What did you say?

SNOTGLOB- There's nothing wrong with abusing children in the name of bringing down the Bush-Hitler Reich.

TEKTAK- You honestly believe that?

SNOTGLOB- Bush is ultimately responsible for her abusing those children, since if he wasn't such a Nazi, she wouldn't have to abuse children to make him look bad!

TEKTAK- Snotglob, once again you have exposed exactly how the left really thinks.

SNOTGLOB- It's a gift.

TEKTAK- Now some enterprising conservatives are taking these bad pictures as an opportunity to get their tough message across, take a look...

SNOTGLOB- Fascist propaganda! Why isn't there photo-shopped blood drooling out of his mouth?

TEKTAK- Next topic: The Barack Obama campaign was embarrassed for attacking McCain about his not using e-mail--

SNOTGLOB- McCain doesn't e-mail! McCain doesn't e-mail! Nyah-nyah-nyah!

TEKTAK- McCain has to dictate his e-mails to either his secretary or his wife because the North Vietnamese broke his fingers and shoulders, leaving him unable to type without terrible pain.

SNOTGLOB- Nyah-nyah! McCain was tortured! McCain was tortured! Nyah-nyah!

TEKTAK- Stop that or I will beat you about the head with a brick. How can you just sit there and mock a man who was brutally tortured in the service of his country.

SNOTGLOB- Cry me a river. So what he's been tortured, Barack Obama had to sit through a Barbara Streisand concert. That's sacrifice in the greater good!

TEKTAK- So what if McCain doesn't type his own e-mails. Bill Clinton wrote something like two e-mails in his entire presidency, and both of them were about buying porn.

SNOTGLOB- See, Clinton supports free speech! Unlike Sarah Palin, who bans books!

TEKTAK- I was wondering when we were going to get to that. You say that Sarah Palin banned books?

SNOTGLOB- Yes.

TEKTAK- And what proof do you have? Do you have any paperwork from the Wasilla city hall, maybe some memos, photos or video of the book burning?

SNOTGLOB- I have an e-mail that says so!

TEKTAK- I rest my case on the importance of e-mail. That's all for now, so until next time, stay on point.

1 comment:

marvin said...

McCain can also point out that he is probably the only candidate for president who has ever killed a man. I would rather have Red Foreman kicking his boot up some a** then Kelso gabbing about how beautiful he was.