I'd like to start off by making a few things clear since I have to make this commentary locked inside this steel tube. I am not Oprah's boyfriend Stedman, and I am not the cop from Barney Miller, played so ably by Ron Glass. I am the Attorney General of this country, and as your Attorney General I have to say this.

America is a nation of cowards when it comes to the issue of race.

Face it, if we weren't a bunch of sniveling cowards drunk on white guilt, someone in the mainstream media would have asked questions about Barack Obama's associations with radical leftist terrorists, racist preachers, and crooked machine politicians. But you didn't, you just let him swan on into the most powerful office in the land, without a challenge to his heavily spun version of personal history, his gaffes, or his lack of experience.

And now we have a controversy where a cartoon comparing Nancy Pelosi to a deranged chimpanzee is somehow being reconstrued as a racist attack on Obama, even though editorial cartoonists drew Bush as a chimp on a daily basis.

I mean if Obama had written that bill that's got more pork than a Bavarian butcher shop then I might be able to make some sort of thin connection between the president and the cartoon. But Obama outsourced it, like everything else so far in his presidency, to someone else, which makes the connection too tenuous for even Al Sharpton to make if he didn't have the entire mainstream media kissing his backside.

If America had any balls when it came to accusations of racism, they'd ask why Obama politicized the Census Bureau by putting it under the control of the most partisan political hack in Washington.

But they aren't asking any questions, because they are all chickenshit of some race baiting charlatan like Sharpton or Jesse Jackson calling them racist, because then they'd have to fork over the cash to get them to shut up.

If I wasn't profiting so hugely from this cowardice, I'd be more openly disgusted with you all, and telling you about it even when I'm not locked in some strange machine that makes me tell the truth.

Can I get out now? I have to find something to prosecute Rush Limbaugh on.

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