Overheard By Snotglob: We're Sorry

Hello Earthlings.

It's your friend Snotglob here.

Remulak has let me post again, because I have an exclusive scoop that will enlighten you all.

The Fox News and Talk Radio fascists are going after Michael Posner the Assistant Secretary of State for Human Right etc., for apologizing to China's leader over Arizona's recent transformation into a Nazi Genocide state by demanding immigrants to produce ID when the pigs harass them.

Well, it just so happens that I heard the whole conversation. It was a telephone call between Posner and Chinese leader Hu Jintao at this meeting, and I have posted the complete transcript for you.

JINTAO: Welcome Mr. Assistant Secretary, you honor me with...

POSNER: I'm sorry, but I really have to apologize.

JINTAO: For what?

POSNER: For Arizona.

JINTAO: What about Arizona?

POSNER: Right now, as we speak, Arizona has become the greatest human rights violator the world has ever known, and as the voice of the American people I feel I must apologize for this to you, the leader of the freest and most democratic state in the world.

JINTAO: What?

POSNER: We are so very, very sorry.

JINTAO: Wait a minute. Do you know what country you're calling?

POSNER: Yes, I must apologize for Arizona's ongoing atrocity. If only America had the strong central leadership that you have here in China we'd have been able to stop it. But that damn constitution is holding us back.

JINTAO: What is Arizona doing?

POSNER: You haven't heard?

JINTAO: No. What's happening in Arizona.

POSNER: If the cops stop an illegal immigrant for a traffic violation, or for committing a crime... they... they...

JINTAO: They what?

POSNER: They ask for their ID.

JINTAO: And then they....

POSNER: Well, we assume they report them to our immigration department for deportation back to Mexico.

JINTAO: They don't shoot them and send a bill to their families for the bullet?

POSNER: No.

JINTAO: They don't torture them? Burn them alive? Rape them?

POSNER: No.

JINTAO: Then what's the big deal?

POSNER: It's the most horrible violation of human rights the world has ever seen since the fascist pigs of the Bush administration water-boarded that poor innocent man Khalid Sheikh Mohammed!

JINTAO: Okay... Now I get it. Ashton Kutcher's going to jump out from behind the fern and tell me I'm "Punk'd" or something like that?

POSNER: What are you talking about?

JINTAO: I'm talking about you talking like a crazy man.

POSNER: I see. The scale of this holocaust is just too massive for you to conceive. I understand, but you must believe.

JINTAO: Are you on some sort of medication or something?

POSNER: Please! I'm begging you! You're the moral leader of the world! You must forgive us for our crimes against humanity!

JINTAO: Do you know any history?

POSNER: I memorized everything written by Howard Zinn.

JINTAO: Sheesh, I never thought I'd have to say this...

POSNER: Oh, I'd like to also apologize for our ongoing brutal oppression of America's Muslim population.

JINTAO: Really, you finally started rounding them up, eh?

POSNER: No. It's just that we keep catching Muslims committing or trying to commit terrorist acts.. Sorry, I mean man caused disasters, and we're sorry that it might spark a racist backlash that really hasn't materialized even though Muslims have killed thousands of Americans and other westerners the world over. The government of the USA is very, very sorry for driving them to kill our citizens by buying their nation's oil, not killing Jews, and failing to sign the Kyoto Protocol.

JINTAO: Okay, I think I'm going to hang up now.

POSNER: Oh, I've offended you. I'm so sorry. So very very sorry.

JINTAO: Will you please stop apologizing! Don't you realize that my government's killed millions of people, tens of millions really, most of them for being the wrong religion or political persuasion. We've invaded Tibet, killed thousands of Tibetans, and continue to do so! What the hell is wrong with you? Arizona's policy is exponentially nicer than ours, and it's way nicer than Mexico's who regularly abuse and imprison illegal aliens from El Salvador and Honduras for merely passing through their country. What is your major malfunction that you feel you have to apologize simply because one state wants to enforce a pre-existing and very mild federal law? Why do you have to apologize for doing nothing wrong?

POSNER: Sorry I got you so mad.

CLICK-- DIAL TONE

Keep watching the skies, because we're watching you, and I'm listening too.