9.07.2005

Episode #5: The Storm is over, but the wind keeps blowing.

MOXARGON- Today the Earthlings of the American Empire begin the clean up of one of their cities, a place called NorLeenz, after a terrible storm called a hurry-katrina. There is much political finger-pointing from OverLord DubyaBush's political rivals who are blaming him for problems with the evacuation and rescue efforts. Panel, what do you think of Overlord Dubyabush's handling of the crisis.

ANDROID CAI/7- Very poorly. The mere fact that Overlord Dubyabush is letting his enemies live to make these accusations is a sure sign of weakness on his part.

XRAN- I agree with Android Cai/7. If they were pointing fingers at me over the bloody weather, I'd bite them off.

DRONE-9099- Exterminate! Exterminate!

MOXARGON- Excellent point. Well, Overlord Dubyabush may not be as weak as you think he is. The Prefect of NorLeenz, an Earthling named RayNay-Gin, is telling the Earthling media that someone named See-Hi-Hay will assassinate him for his criticism of OverLord Dubyabush.

ANDROID CAI/7- He should be, but not just for his criticism. I'd have had him and his entire staff summarily vaporized for incompetence in handling the situation. He is the Prefect of the City, and it was his duty to be the frontline manager in emergencies like hurry-katrina, and he failed miserably.

XRAN- Vaporization's letting him off easy. He let over two hundred personnel transports get destroyed by the flood when he had forty-eight hours to use them in the evacuation, now hundreds, maybe thousands of his subjects are dead, and tens of thousands more have had to endure unspeakable hardships because of his failure to follow his own city's plan. If one of my pirate captains acted like the Prefect of NorLeenz and the ProConsul of Loos-hee-Anna, I'd have had him fired. Preferably head-first out of tri-sonic cannon.

MOXARGON- What do you think Drone-9099?

DRONE-9099- Exterminate! Exterminate!

MOXARGON- As always Drone-9099, you have a poet's way with words. I for one don't think RayNay-Gin will be executed or assassinated. These humans don't appear to believe in the proper punishment of dissenters and incompetent henchmen.

XRAN- How primitive.

ANDROID CAI/7- How illogical.

MOXARGON- Besides, if this mythical See-Hi-Hay hasn't gotten around to taking out Mudder Shee-Hawn, Myk-Hell-Mor or Jonk-Hairy, I don't see him wasting his time, you know, wasting RayNay-Gin. Our next topic is related. A wrapper, named Kan-Yea-Wes, says that Bush has only sent in the Imperial Guard in NorLeenz, not to aid in the rescue and recovery mission, but to kill subjects because of their skin color.

ANDROID CAI/7- That's a highly illogical statement. Why would OverLord Dubyabush want to kill his subjects because of a difference in skin color? Especially when he appears to have a predilection for putting people like that in powerful and trusted positions in his court. It does not compute.

XRAN- I'm with you there, all subjects of the Empire are the property of their Imperial OverLord, and thus equal in every way, regardless of skin tone. By the way, what is a wrapper?

MOXARGON- He's some sort of entertainer. I guess he must wrap things in entertaining and dramatic ways because he is making a lot of money doing it.

ANDROID CAI/7- These Earthlings have highly illogical forms of entertainment.

XRAN- I know. I tried watching one of their 'reality shows' where people sang for prizes, and they didn't execute the losers. How can anything without disemboweling blades be called entertainment?

MOXARGON- This wrapper has also complained about how the Earthling media has portrayed people like him. Claiming that the media said paler Earthlings who were taking things out of businesses were simply looking for supplies while people like him were supposed to be looting.

ANDROID CAI/7- I've studied their broadcasts on the hyper-observascope and if any divisions are to be noticed, it would be based on gender. Earthling females have been shown obtaining food, medicine, or clean clothing from abandoned businesses, while Earthling males, both pale and dark, were seen taking primitive electronic entertainment devices, jewellery, and alcohol, all of which are useless in a survival situation.

XRAN- Where will those brainiacs plug in their new electronics? Everything's underwater? Obviously a large portion of the brain power lies with the female of this species.

DRONE-9099- Exterminate! Exterminate!

MOXARGON- Excellent point as always, Drone-9099. And I'll have to let you have the last word, because that's all the time we have for now, so until next time, keep watching the skies, because we're watching you.

2 comments:

Fitch said...

Yes, A large part of the brain power does rest with the females of the species. My but you have quite the grasp of Earth civilization.

Damian G. said...

What are the group's thoughts on Governor Kathleen Blanco?

Surely, she must be guilty of negligence in that she didn't heed the President's pleading for a FULL evacuation of the state?