9.14.2005

Episode #6: Signs, Symbols, and Stupidity...

THE SOYLENT CORPORATION
'We make people useful."
present
THE MOXARGON GROUP

MOXARGON: Welcome puny Earthlings to another edition of the Moxargon group. Today we're discussing memorials. As you may have heard the American Empire is in the midst of war, and naturally wherever there's a war, memorials are sure to pop up. First came the proposals for the memorial for the victims of the Noo Hork attacks that present the American Empire as the source of all the troubles in the planet, and now there's another memorial that some claim appears to be honoring the attackers.

What do you think panel?

ANDROID CAI/7: This does not compute. The people who attacked the Americans claim that they're chief motivation for their murder of civilians was their religion. A religion that is symbolized by the crescent shape designers are using in this memorial. Why are they honoring their enemies?

XRAN: I think it's those pesky moonbat creatures at work again. They claim that this memorial supposed to honor "peace and understanding," but as like all their attempts at "understanding" it only serves to expose their own ignorance of what's happening on their own planet.

DRONE-9099: Exterminate! Exterminate!

MOXARGON: Both you and Xran make excellent points. But I don't think that the moonbats are acting out of ignorance. There seems to be a psychological problem afflicting the entire moonbat community. To the moonbat: people who attack them deserve sympathy, people who defend them deserve scorn, and that war memorials should honor those who slaughter innocent people and ignore those who gave up their own lives to save others.

ANDROID CAI/7: Don't forget their illogical desire to destroy the only sub-planetary empires that allow them to live freely and not enslaved or processed for nutritional supplements.

XRAN: Even if the designers didn't intend to honor the attackers, this Al Kayda fellow who started this war will no doubt use this idiotic coincidence for propaganda purposes.

MOXARGON: Sure, if some planet I was invading built a memorial that in any-way resembled the sacred hukka-pukka of Tellurax, I'd be on it like stink on an Altherian bog-weasel. I'd be making speeches claiming it was a sign of the enemy's inevitable surrender and use it to recruit some of the dimmer fanatics to fill the ranks of blaster fodder.

DRONE-9099: Exterminate! Exterminate!

XRAN: Exactly.

MOXARGON: So, panel, what do you suggest as an alternative design for this memorial?

ANDROID CAI/7: Memorials are illogical to a machine with perfect memory chips.

XRAN: You can't go wrong with a simple obelisk with the names of the honored dead carved on it, surrounded by pikes, each with the severed head of an enemy mounted on it.

MOXARGON: Now that would be perfect. You just have to make sure the pikes are in a circle and not a crescent to avoid any misunderstandings. That's all the time we have for now, so until next time, keep watching the skies, because we're watching you.

2 comments:

Fitch said...

I originally thought that the memorial represented the crescent of Islam, but I now believe that it represents the shape of the crash site. That makes me feel less angry than I was originally.

SeanS said...

Why red though? It just seems too coincidental.