Point/Counterpoint-Who's Afraid of the Big Bad Muslim?

TEKTAK- Welcome puny Earthlings to Point/Counterpoint. I'm Tektak F. Mechanoid and joining me, as usual, is Snotglob the Mutant. Say hello Snotglob.

SNOTGLOB- Hello Snotglob.

TEKTAK- Today we're discussing a new word that folks want added to the English language. It's called Islamophobia and it means the fear of Islamic people otherwise known as Muslims. Various prominent Islamic leaders are using this new word to pressure western governments and societies...

SNOTGLOB- And right they are. Islamophobia is racism pure and simple.

TEKTAK- Snotglob you ignorant hermaphrodite slut. Islam isn't a race, it's a religion, that encompasses several geographic groups that humans call races.

SNOTGLOB- Then they shouldn't be oppressing people because of their religion.

TEKTAK- Non-Muslims only oppress Muslims in the paranoid fantasies of the Islamic world's political and religious elite. In our universe, all the real oppression of Muslims is done by their fellow Muslims. Muslims who live in non-Muslim societies on average have standards of living way above their co-religionists in their native countries.

SNOTGLOB- But what about those terrible cartoons, if they're not a symptom of Islamophobia I'll eat my shirt.

TEKTAK- You don't wear a shirt, you have a shell.

SNOTGLOB- It's a figure of speech. Those cartoons were a direct provocation of the peaceful Islamic community, 60 Minutes said so.

TEKTAK- That's another 'fake yet inaccurate' story Snotglob. Those cartoons were drawn because an author of children's books wanted to publish a book on the life of the Prophet Mohammed in order to promote peace and understanding, but couldn't find an artist for fear of reprisals from Islamic radicals. When reprinting the cartoons in Egypt last October failed to generate enough outrage some Imams made up some of their own sparking riots and murders worldwide, thus proving the fear-mongers right. I thought I explained all this already.

SNOTGLOB- You probably did, but when you start ranting it kinda shifts into white noise to me.

TEKTAK- Free speech is being restricted all over the European Union in a vain attempt to appease radical Islamists which will only succeed in getting them to manufacture more grievances with which to bully others with. They decry Islamophobia, but then use it to get their way it's hypocrisy of the worst order and odour.

SNOTGLOB- Even moderate Muslims are saying the cartoons were offensive.

TEKTAK- They're free to be offended, but no one can claim the title of moderate if they demand the free speech and rights of others be curtailed, especially when it comes with the thinly veiled threat of radical violence. That's both the problem and the solution of living in a free society. People are free to offend you, and you're free to call them jerks for doing it, and you're free to not buy their product or service, but you cannot bully someone from being a jerk with threats and violence.

SNOTGLOB- But what about the politicians calling Islam a 'religion of peace?'

TEKTAK- There are many things in Islam that promote peace, but folks don't seem to be reading those parts of the Koran these days. Muslims in Nigeria began massacring Christians and burning their churches. Muslim leaders said it was revenge for the Danish cartoons, but no Nigerian Christians were involved with the cartoons. Do 'religions of peace' go looking for such thin excuses to commit murder, rape and vandalism?

SNOTGLOB- But Christians fought religious wars, what have you got to say about that smart bot?

TEKTAK- Sure the Christians of Earth did a lot of terrible things that cost many thousands of lives. But here's a little bit of data, that's mostly history, not news. How many mainstream Christian preachers call for genocide from their pulpits? How many Christian schools instruct their students to strap bombs to their bodies to detonate themselves in the middle of crowded buses and restaurants? How many Christian mothers run for elected office on a record of turning their sons into murderers, for a party committed to genocide and win? Any Christian who tries anything like that will be declared a raving lunatic by the majority and cast out to the fringes of society. For the most recent example look at the pseudo-Christian Slobodan Milosevic, who was turfed from power and put on trial for his crimes, by the predominantly Christian USA, and the nominally Christian Europe for crimes against innocent Muslims. Meanwhile the Islamic mainstream tries to qualify or justify the actions of the radicals through a mix of liberal guilt and or historic or imagined grievances.

SNOTGLOB- There are moderate Muslims out there.

TEKTAK- There are, and we shouldn't be afraid of them. But they've joined the ranks of moderate Germans of the 1930s, and moderate Russians of Stalin's Soviet Union in the dustbin of history. They're scared too, but only a few have the stones to admit it publicly and stand up to the radicals. The rest, aided and abetted by Earthling liberals pass the blame onto the victims.

SNOTGLOB- I think Islamophobia is a real thing and should end.

TEKTAK- I agree with you. Islamophobia is real, but its cause isn't Western prejudice. It's caused by the behaviour of Muslims and the silence or moral qualifications of the so called 'moderates.' The majority of Earthlings are in their 21st century, and they're watching people who claim to represent around a billion earthlings kill Christians, Jews, Hindus, Buddhist, Atheists, Homosexuals, Women, and most of all fellow Muslims they deem to be 'impure.'

SNOTGLOB- I think we can stop Islamophobia by stop offending the Muslim community.

TEKTAK- By the Sacred Servos of Triplexicon 9, you really are thick. Islamic radicals are OFFENDED BY EVERYTHING THEY DO NOT CONTROL. The only way Earthlings, even moderate Muslims, can appease such people is to submit to their absolute control over every aspect of your life. As Earthling columnist Mark Steyn says, if these radical Islamists were true believers they wouldn't be offended by cartoons, or the existence of non-believers, they'd be offended by the fact that the name of their beloved prophet is the name of choice for so many nasty little scumbags like:

• Mohammed Atta, the chief mass murderer of 9/11.
• Asif Mohammed Hanif, who blew up a bar full of people in Tel Aviv.
• Heshamed Mohammed Hanif, who shot up an El Al ticket counter.
• Ali Mohamed, who blew up American embassies in Kenya and Tanzania.
• Mohammed Bouyeri, the murderer of Theo Van Gogh.
• Mohammed Skaf, the Sydney Australia gang rapist who claimed Islam justified his crimes.
• John Allen Muhammed, the Washington Sniper.

They're the real insults to Islam, not cartoons, not Jews, not Christians, and not anyone else. If Muslims want to know the real cause of Islamophobia, they should look in the mirror.

SNOTGLOB- You're big on passing the blame, but do you have a solution?

TEKTAK- This problem has three possible solutions. One, radical Islam succeeds in conquering the world, plunging it into a dark age of perpetual war and death that will leave it ripe for invasion by folks like us. Two, the moderate Muslims shake their fear of their radical brethren and cast them out from the mainstream and into the darkness where they belong. They have to embrace the future and such things as democracy and freedom or they'll end up facing the third way...

SNOTGLOB- What's the third way?

TEKTAK- Even I don't like this one. The third way is if the radical Islamofascists try to take over the world and the rest of the world does what it's done too many times before when threatened: Annihilation.

SNOTGLOB- That's not a happy ending.

TEKTAK- Not for anyone, that's why options One and Three must be avoided at all costs if Earth is to survive this crisis. That's all for us today. Tune in next time for Point/Counterpoint.