Hi there Earthlings.
I've been bugging Remulak to let me do more for the site, to offer a more liberal perspective. For a long time he gave me all kinds of excuses as to why I should stick to doing just Point/Counterpoint. But I could see right through them. Being an idiot does not disqualify you from being a blogger.
So here I am, using what Remulak says is my only real talent.
My excellent sense of hearing.
So here's a conversation I overheard between two Earthlings. Let's all take a listen.
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Dammit Al, you sure got my nads in a vice over that stupid "nappy headed hos" remark I made.
Serves you right for being an idiot. Now I own your scrawny old white ass.
Can't we work something out. I got suspended for two weeks because of this. I need the money. Cowboy hats and bad haircuts don't grow on trees you know.
Hell no you wheezy old mullet wearing cracker. I need celebrities like you to say stupid things. That way I can get you on my radio show, score lots of free press, truckloads of donations to my 'cause,' and have my butt kissed on CNN by that uber-honky Anderson Cooper.
Besides, I have to keep yelling, or they'll might just start looking into my history for another excuse to avoid covering successful operations in Iraq.
What about me?
I could lose my job.
Chill out. You're a liberal, you won't get fired. Now if you were a right winger, your ass would be grass faster than a Democrat out of a honorable commitment.
Just stick to making fun of Republicans, conservative Christians, Jews, and politically disobedient homosexuals and you'll be fine.
That makes me feel better. Maybe I should blame my troubles on Israel.
That's the spirit.
2 comments:
Imus isn't THAT liberal. He supports John McCain for President!
Oh, wait.
Good stuff here, very funny...
absurd thought -
God of the Universe likes
racist liberals
exploit race relations
feed problems make a living
.
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