5.17.2008

TekTak's Culture Corner: Hillary Sings! The Bush Sings!

I have just obtained the lyrics to Hillary Clinton's new campaign song. It goes to the tune of Bonnie Tyler's "Total Eclipse of the Heart" and the lyrics were written by Hillary herself...

HILLARY CLINTON'S NEW CAMPAIGN SONG

Vote for me,

Every now and then I get a little bit lonely when voters don't come around
Vote for me,

Every now and then I get a little bit tired of losing to a guy named Obama

Vote for me,

Every now and then I get a little bit nervous that my chance for power has gone by
Vote for me,

Every now and then I get a little bit terrified when I see how my poll standing dies
Vote for me white guys,

Or my poor campaign will fall apart
Vote for me white guys,

Or my poor campaign will fall apart

Vote for me,

Every now and then I get a little bit restless 'cuz Florida's disqualified
Vote for me,

Every now and then I get a little bit pissed off about my hubby's big mouth
Vote for me,

Every now and then I get really angry but women will vote for me when I cry
Vote for me,

Every now and then I get a little bit terrified when I see them vote for the black guy
Vote for me white guys,

Or my poor campaign will fall apart
Vote for me white guys,

Or my poor campaign will fall apart

And I need you to vote white
And I need it more than ever
And if you'll only treat me right
I'll be ruling you forever
And we'll be sticking it to the right
Cause I'm the one who's Caucasian
My race talk maybe goes over the line
And I got Reverend Wright's on Obama's ass all of the time
His preacher is insane and bouncing off the walls
I maybe a woman but I'm the one with the balls


I really need you to vote white
Democrat's gotta vote white
Democrat's gotta vote white

Once upon a time I was Queen of the scene
But now my campaign's falling apart
If you don't vote for me
You can totally kiss my arse


Ultimate power was the light in my life
But now my campaigns as bright as a fart
If you don't vote for me
You can totally kiss my arse

Vote for me white guys
Vote for me white guys


Vote for me,

Every now and then I know you'll never be as electable as little old me
Vote for me,

Every now and then I know Democrats are more racist than sexist

Vote for me,

Every now and then the press acts like there's no one in the universe as magical and wondrous as you
Vote for me,

Everyone knows that there is nothing I wouldn't do to beat you
Vote for me white guys,

Or my poor campaign will fall apart
Vote for me white guys,

Or my poor campaign will fall apart

And I need you to vote white
And I need it more than ever
And if you'll only treat me right
I'll be ruling you forever
And we'll be sticking it to the right
Cause I'm the one who's Caucasian
My race talk maybe goes over the line
But I was actually in the White House once upon a time
Obama's wife is a crank and Iran's dancing in the halls
I maybe a woman but I'm the one with the balls


I really need you to vote white
Democrat's gotta vote white
Democrat's gotta vote white

Once upon a time I the media's star

But now my campaign's falling apart

If you don't vote for me
You can totally kiss my arse


Seizing power was the light in my life
But now everyone loves old Barack
If you don't vote for me
You can totally kiss my arse

And even George W. Bush is getting musical, with this new tune he co-wrote with Carly Simon:

You're So Vain by George W. Bush & Carly Simon

You have the Democratic party
Nomination tied in a knot
Your delegates making you the top guy
Putting Clinton down but not out
And I just make, one little speech
And all of you just freak out
And Joe Biden said it was bullshit,
Said it was bullshit, and

You're so vain
You probably think my speech was about you
You're so vain
I'll bet you think my speech was about you
Don't you? Don't you?

You popped up several years ago
And you're still quite naive
Well, you and Iran make such a pretty pair
And from Iraq you will quickly leave
And give away the USA's friends
To some tyrants to appease
I had some words, they were in a speech in the Knesset

Speech in the Knesset, and

You're so vain
You probably think my speech was about you
You're so vain
I'll bet you think my speech was about you
Don't you? Don't you?

I had some words they were in a speech to the Knesset
Speech to the Knesset, and

You're so vain
You probably think my speech was about you
You're so vain
I'll bet you think my speech was about you

Don't you? Don't you?

Well, I hear you want to go to Venezuela
And tell Hugo Chavez that he's won
Then you'll fly Air Force 1 up to old Tehran
To show Ayatollahs how to have fun

But, you're not on my mind all the time
And when you're not, I'm talking 'bout

Some weak politician kissing up to Hitler
saying "peace in our time," and

You're so vain
You probably think my speech was about you
You're so vain
I'll bet you think my speech was about you
Don't you? Don't you?

Who knew this folks were so musically inclined?

1 comment:

zoey said...

i knew that the president was musical because i've seen him dance. *cough*