6.24.2008

EXCLUSIVE EXPOSE!

Greetings puny Earthlings.

You can stop your theorizing at our sidebar poll, a detailed scan of Al Gore's mansion has revealed his need for such massive amounts of electricity.

BEHOLD!Shocking, isn't it?

It seems a bizarre laboratory accident while trying to cure Tipper of frigidity had a terrible effect on Al Gore. It left him completely unable to survive for very long in above freezing temperatures, and he has to be in this electric powered refrigerator suit the bulk of the day.

It explains a lot of his behaviour.

It's why he thinks a rise of 1 or 2 degrees over a century would be some sort of catastrophe. It is for him, he needs everything polar in order to be comfortable in public wearing his speedo.

It's why he won't debate anyone on the topic of Global Warming. Because there's always a chance that the debate may go long and being unable to return to his fridge-suit in time, he'd melt.

It's also why he's whoring so shamelessly for money. He's not really a greedy intellectually corrupt pig after all, he's just fighting to survive.

Now I actually feel some sympathy for Gore.

Not much, in fact very little, but some, and that's saying something.

Keep watching the skies, because we're watching you.

1 comment:

Wyatt Earp said...

Oh come on, give the man a break. He's just trying to make a quick buck off the dim-witted people of America.