And I Thought I Had An Ego...

A
SPECIAL
VIEW
FROM THE
AFTERLIFE
COMMENTARY
BY
NERO
CLAUDIUS CAESAR
AUGUSTUS
GERMANICUS

Hello there all you folks in the land of the living. It is I, Nero Claudius Caesar Augustus Germanicus, but everyone just calls me Nero. In case you don't know your history, I used to be the Emperor of Rome, now I'm in Hades talking to you through Vox Poplar's digital ouija board.

I've been watching your politics lately and I must say that I'm impressed by your Barack Obama fellow. I like the cut of his jib, as the more nautically inclined are apt to say.

He's got a wonderful imperial swagger about him, and I enjoy the way the media worships him like a god on Earth, and how he tries to silence, or criminally prosecute anyone who dares criticize him. He's not bound by some irrelevant little scrap of paper like the constitution, he's destined to rule you all and he knows it.

I really like the lovely imperial theatre he's constructed for his victory speech. Nothing says raving narcissism like building a temple to yourself.

And it's not like there weren't any signs of this before. Face it, he was editor and chief of the Harvard Law Review, and a law school instructor, and the only works of scholarship he ever produced were two books telling everyone how great he is.

Bloody brilliant.

Well, it's about time you Americans dispense with your silly democracy, and get yourselves a proper ruler, so vote for Obama.